


Honestly, Why Did We Need A Giant Dog?

by orphan_account



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Devil's Nest, Dog - Freeform, Gen, Humor, alchemy happens by people who are not named elric, edward and alphonse were raised by the devil's nest, edward was right, first fic, greed is a big kid, greed should have gotten a smaller dog, human transmutaion didn't happen, no alchemy involved, possibly a multi chapter fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-24
Updated: 2016-02-27
Packaged: 2018-05-22 22:04:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6095437
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Edward knew that Greed should have gotten a smaller dog, and now it was coming back to haunt the Homunculus.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. In Which Greed Has A Giant Dog

**Author's Note:**

> This is a tentative start to a fic, if you have any questions as to the AU, just ask. I will try to clear things up the best I can.  
> Basic idea is that Greed found Ed and Al when they were kids, and they ended up joining the crew and bascally becoming the entire groups' kids.

"I TOLD you to get a smaller breed of dog, but NOO!" Ed ranted at a sheepish Greed, arms crossed. The Homunculus in question was buried under a large, brown dog named Sparky. When they first got sparky, she had been small enough to cuddle in Greed's vest pocket for a nap. However, she had quickly grown into the monstrous beast that was big enough to tackle the non-human man to the ground. Not only did Edward find this disturbing and slightly scary, but also a source of annoyance whenever Greed had the audacity to complain about it. 

"Honestly, Greed," the blond sighed in exasperation as he shook his head, "maybe if you just got a dog small enough for the bar, then she wouldn't be able to tackle you twenty-four-seven." He did, in all honesty, have a point. His point was even a good one, but that did not make Greed any more willing to change his mind. Instead, the raven haired Homunculus just rolled his eyes, crossing his arms like a spoiled child. 

Ed responded with his own eye-roll, stalking out of the room. "Fine. By the way, you might wanna get Sparky out of the room before she and Dorchet have their stupid Territory Wars again. He's coming home today, and he is going to be cranky as fuck." The heavy wooden door slammed on Greed's paled face. The Territory Wars were never fun. Especially between a hormonal female dog and a possessive male dog chimera. 

Meanwhile, Martel just shook her head at the fact that their youngest (humanoid) member somehow brought out their boss' inner child without even trying. It was like the kid had a talent for it. Of course, that talent only increased when his baby brother was around to fuel his prank-like tendencies.


	2. In Which Martel Gets Ed On Her Ass

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Martel should have learned long ago that Al can be really sensitive, and that Ed wad ridiculously overprotective of his little brother. Unfortunately, she seemed to forget about that tofay, and she has to have a yelled conversation with Ed through a door which she barricaded.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry, I just thought that an argument between an overprotective and bratty Ed and Martel would be funny.

"ED! Listen to me! I didn't mean to hurt Al's feelings!" Martel yells, not even ashamed about her edge of panic. Ed would probably make her life hell for years if she didn't calm him down, and he was very insistent on not being calmed. 

"IT DOESN'T MATTER! YOU STILL MADE AL CRY!" he snarled, stomping his foot. 

"IT DOES MATTER!" she yelled back, forgetting her maturity. "I DIDN'T MEAN IT AND THAT MEANS YOU SHOULD LEAVE ME ALONE!"

"I DON'T NEED TO LEAVE ANYBODY ALONE! YOU NEED TO SAY SORRY TO AL!"

"Brother," Al was heard sniffling outside of the door, "y-you can leave Miss Martel alone. I-It's okay, really."

"LIKE HELL IT'S OKAY! SHE MADE YOU CRY, AND IT SHE NEEDS TO APOLOGIZE!" Ed was too pissed to even listen to his brother, which was a bad sign. 

Meanwhile, Greed watched the whole ridiculous scene, sighing deeply. Why did he even pick up kids? They just start silly arguments like this, and start crying over teasing and shit. Honestly, his own possessions were going to drive him insane someday.. Though it was a small miracle that Ed had not driven him over the edge already.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for shortness, I actually need to go to bed XDD

**Author's Note:**

> By the way, I did invent Sparky.


End file.
